Tuesday, September 7, 2010
"You dear children have
overcome them, because the one who is in you is greater than the one who is in
the world."
1 John 4:4
I am not going to actually talk about the bible verse I posted above... I just like the bible verse. The only comment I can make about it is, God is so amazing, I feel so good that he is in me and that he is greater than the one who is in the world, in other words Satan.
Well I'm going to continue my super long story of what has been going on lately. Like I said before I was and still am excited about trusting that God will take me to Europe to make a difference. Yeah I know how can just one person make a difference, well I believe that God will use me in incredible ways and by that I mean that I am going to always try to be as radical as I can.
So at the beginning of the month I was trying really hard to find ways I could attend a DTS in Hamburg, Germany. I was psyched out if I could say that, I was so excited I sent an email to their base, I sent personal messages to one of the leaders, and well I did what I could do. So during all this month I was so eager to check out my email to see if the YWAM Hamburg base had responded to my email. Unfortunately it never came. Days and days passed by and on the outside I seemed unstoppable, if you saw me you would say wow you are really committed and convinced that you are going, that's admirable! Unfortunately on the inside I kind of had that sweet emotion, but there was still the deceiving feeling of doubt. To tell the truth I was desperate and losing my hopes because they didn't answer my email, I thought that probably all that I have been thinking of was just some dumb idea I had. I strongly believed that I had to go to Hamburg and that there was no other German base that I would go to. I was very disappointed because the Hamburg base leaders never answered, so I "betrayed" them. I started looking for other bases in Germany. I actually found the perfect DTS, the Go Europe Mobile DTS. As I said before my calling is in Europe, not specifically Germany. This DTS starts out in Germany and then moves from the north to the south of Europe. This is what it said:
"...our desire is that in each place where we've been, we will leave something behind. We want to be used by God and experience His guidance, power and provision.
This DTS is a mobile learning community that’s traveling from the north to the south of Europe, and while we are doing this, we trust that we will see God moving and bringing change...will be on the road to not only see the beauty of the cities we’ll go to, but to we want to go beyond minister in the darkest boroughs and engage with the challenge. We want to feel God’s mercy for the prostitutes of Amsterdam, feel God’s broken heart for the Muslim migrants that live in the ghettos of Paris, for the drug addicts in the streets of Hamburg….
After the 12 weeks of lecture in some of the countries of Europe, we will take you even further to Asia, the Middle East or Africa, and maybe even more deeply into Europe - however God leads us...you will deepen the things you have learned and apply it even more to reach the lost and to serve the poor and needy.
Come to Europe! Learn, become passionate, overcome passivity, reach out to the lost, and have an amazing group of people around you from all over the world that will encourage and help you to grow and change into the person God intended you to be. Seek growth! Seek change! Become active! Become someone who brings change into the nations of this world."
Ok, don't tell me you read that and did not get exited, it’s just amazing! I read that and say this is perfect for what God has put in my heart to do in Europe. So “this is it” I said, I’m going. If God could write in words what he had put in my heart, he had done it with the description of this DTS. I love the last sentence “Become someone who brings change into the nations of this world.” That is what I want to do…for the moment God just has put in my heart Europe but who knows! Maybe he has something else for me. I didn't quite understand this a week ago. I was so concentrated on going to Europe I was missing the other offer I had, and that was to go to Mexico. I had to make a decision, I wasn't aware of this until my brother told me, “hey Steph have you considered going to Mexico, I mean it is a good offer for you to go there, and God already provided the money for you to go there” Wow, for me this was DILEMMA! Should I do what I feel like doing or what He has ready to go for me? Finally I decided to do what my heart felt like doing, and at the same time I asked God for his will to be done.
Later on, Yvonne from the base in Herrnhut, Germany finally responded my email and sent me my application and reference form. I was really seeing that I was going to go to Germany. I was so excited, so happy…To my surprise later on they sent me an email saying that they don’t think that I could assist the DTS because getting a visa takes at least 2 months and we are 1 month away from the starting time of the DTS. At first I tried to pull it all together and simply hide my sadness behind my usual mask of happiness and somehow looking “mature” by accepting that God didn't want me to go to the DTS on October. I was at a friend’s house when I found out I wasn't going, at least I didn't completely fake my smiles, I wasn't being myself at that time. I sunk myself into my own blackberry world and was impolitely paying no attention to a friend that I only see twice a year at least. Fortunately the blackberry world helped me in the long run. As I was on msn A very good friend reminded me that it was God who didn't want me to go, maybe God has something better or different, you just never know. That is the beauty of God he loves to surprise his children, and that is one of the reasons I like to follow him, he always has something special and DIFFERENT for me. Now I know where I am supposed to go, and that is Mexico, if it’s still in God’s will I will leave the twenty third to Mexico, to learn how to be a leader and in the way take care of a beautiful baby boy. Now I can say I feel a complete peace, because I am going to do what HE wants me to do! :)
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